Many years ago, when my partner (now my husband) and I were living in Minneapolis, for his birthday I wanted to surprise him with a vintage 1980's Miss Piggy puppet.
He had one as a child and it was his favorite cherished toy. Unfortunately it was thrown out I believe by his mother after he had gone to college. So, I wanted to reunite him with a "new" old one.
It was easy to find on ebay and I purchased one in the middle price range. It didn't matter if it was in the box or not and this one looked like it was in good shape.
He was at work the day it arrived and as I brought the box into the apartment, our three cats ran over and were suddenly very interested. I knew why the moment I opened the box as the most pungent smell of Cat piss began to film the room and I shut the box quickly in disgust and immediately took it to our detached garage.
When Jason came home, I told him what had happened and we both went to the garage and sadly gazed at what could have been an amazing birthday present.
It remained in a corner in our garage for several months. We were now moving to Chicago and Jason was heading out with the cats and I was going to stay and tie up loose ends and catch up with him.
All the boxes had been loaded into the moving truck and off they went. The condo was empty and so I thought I would give the garage one last look to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything.
I immediately saw the Miss Piggy box in the corner and I picked it up and placed it in the exact center of the garage floor so I could sweep around it. I wanted the new owner to be greeted with a nicely swept and clean garage.
I was in a hurry to leave and I was well on my way when I realized, I had left the Miss Piggy puppet in the garage. In the exact center of the garage. It seemed intentional. I was too far on my way to Chicago to turn around. I wondered, what on earth the new owner was going to think of this.
I imagined him opening the door to his new and very nice duplex condo. There were two floors! He would look around with excitement and then see the garage remote on the kitchen counter. "Oh that's right!" he would say to himself, "I have a garage!!" and he would grab the remote and head out back to survey his new garage space.
He would stand before the door, raise the remote and click it and watch the garage door ceremoniously open. The very first thing he would see is the box placed in the exact center of the floor. This would strike him as odd but he would be intrigued as he stepped towards the box, picked it up and opened it.
WHAT on earth did he think?
I never heard from him.
I never heard from the realtor.
All I knew was that as a housewarming gift, I had lovingly left him a Cat piss soaked Miss Piggy puppet.